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Humorous lines of The Simpsons in Chinese

learn chinese, the simpsons

1. Books are useless! I only ever read one book, To Kill A Mockingbird, and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds!

读书没用!我只读过一本叫《杀死一只知更鸟》的书,读完之后我还是不知道怎么杀死知更鸟!

dú shū méi yòng. wǒ zhī dú guò yī běn jiào "shā sǐ yī zhī zhī gèng niǎo" de shū, dú wán zhī hòu wǒ hái shì bú zhī dào zěn me shā sǐ zhī gèng niǎo 

2. What's the point of going out? We're just gonna wind up back home anyway.

出门的意义在哪里?反正早晚还得回家。

chū mén de yì yì zài nǎ lǐ? fǎn zhèng zǎo wǎn hái dé huí jiā 

3. You've got the brains and talent to go as far as you want, and when you do I'll be right there to borrow money.

你这么聪明机智又天赋异禀,梦想一定会实现。你梦想实现的那天,我一定会陪在你身边,向你借钱。

nǐ zhè me cōng míng jī zhì yòu tiān fù yì bǐng, mèng xiǎng yī dìng huì shí xiàn. nǐ mèng xiǎng shí xiàn de nà tiān, wǒ yī dìng huì péi zài nǐ shēn biān, xiàng nǐ jiè qián 

4. It takes two to lie: one to lie and one to listen.

撒谎需要两个人:一个人撒谎,另一个人听着。

sā huǎng xū yào liǎng gè rén: yī gè rén sā huǎng, lìng yī gè rén tīng zhe 

5. Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.

婚姻就是一口棺材,生一个娃就往上敲一个钉。

hūn yīn jiù shì yī kǒu guān cái, shēng yī gè wá jiù wǎng shàng qiāo yī gè dìng 

6. You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: Never try.

你们尽力了但败得很惨。得到的教训就是:永远不要尝试。

nǐ men jìn lì le dàn bài dé hěn cǎn. dé dào de jiāo xùn jiù shì: yǒng yuǎn bú yào cháng shì 

7. Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.

儿子,如果你想在生命中得到什么,你就得付出努力去争取。好了别吵了!彩票快开奖了。

érzi, rú guǒ nǐ xiǎng zài shēng mìng zhōng dé dào shén me, nǐ jiù děi fù chū nǔ lì qù zhēng qǔ. hǎo le bié chǎo le. cǎi piào kuài kāi jiǎng le 

8. How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain.

教育怎么可能让人变聪明?反正我每次学到新东西,脑子里就装不下旧东西。

jiāo yù zěn me kě néng ràng rén biàn cōng míng? fǎn zhèng wǒ měi cì xué dào xīn dōng xī, nǎozi lǐ jiù zhuāng bú xià jiù dōng xī

9. To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

敬酒精!生命中一切问题的起因和答案。

jìng jiǔ jīng. shēng mìng zhōng yī qiè wèn tí de qǐ yīn hé dá àn 

10. Loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.

孤独和芝士汉堡是一个危险的组合。

gū dú hé zhī shì hàn bǎo shì yī gè wēi xiǎn de zǔ hé 

2016-06-21

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